Dilbert cartoon first published on Monday 20th March 1995

Dilbert//2165, first published 31 years ago on Monday 20th March 1995

Tags

human resources down sizing acts like a freind misery of people bat your head business

Official transcript

Dogbert stands on a desk and tells the Boss, "I hired a new director of Human Resources to handle the downsizing."

Dogbert continues, "I needed somebody who acts like a friend but secretly delights in the misery of all people."

Catbert stands on a monitor and says to an employee, "We need to talk, Paul. But first I'm going to bat your head around and scratch you."

Paul responds, "Hee hee!! That's so cute!"

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

I HIRED A NEW DIRECTOR OF HUMAN RESOURCES TO HANDLE THE DOWNSIZING.

I NEEDED SOMEBODY WHO ACTS LIKE A FRIEND BUT SECRETLY DELIGHTS IN THE MISERY OF ALL PEOPLE.

WE NEED TO TALK, PAUL.

BUT FIRST I'M GOING TO BAT YOUR HEAD AROUND AND SCRATCH YOU.

!!

THAT'S SO CUTE!

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Comic Strip Title: "The Misery of All People"

This 'Dilbert' comic strip, originally published in 1995, revolves around the theme of finding companionship and delight in the midst of misery. The strip is divided into three panels, each with its own unique storyline.

Panel 1: The Job Interview

• The first panel introduces a new director of human resources, who is tasked with downsizing the company.
• The director is shown sitting at his desk, with a white figure representing an employee standing before him.
• The employee expresses their desire for a friend who can bring delight to their miserable life.

Panel 2: The Unlikely Friend

• In the second panel, the director is shown speaking to another employee, a red cat-like creature.
• The creature is described as someone who acts like a friend but secretly delights in the misery of all people.
• The director is hesitant to talk to the creature, but eventually agrees to bat its head around and scratch it.

Panel 3: The Unconventional Friendship

• The final panel depicts the director and the red creature engaging in an unconventional conversation.
• The director is shown sitting at his desk, while the creature is perched on top of a computer monitor.
• The creature is described as cute, and the director is shown to be enjoying its company.

Overall, the comic strip pokes fun at the idea of finding companionship in unexpected places and the absurdity of modern office life. The use of anthropomorphic characters adds a touch of humor and whimsy to the strip, making it a relatable and entertaining read for fans of the 'Dilbert' series.

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Accompanying textual content, such as title, tags and transcripts, is shown here if we have it. Not every comic has all of these, and they seem to be a bit hit and miss even on the official website.