Dilbert cartoon first published on Tuesday 26th September 1995

Dilbert//2355, first published 31 years ago on Tuesday 26th September 1995

Tags

hired audit perfect job give money call dolts alice engineer makes slides eat donuts engineering

Official transcript

Dogbert says to Alice, "I've been hired by your company to perform an ISO 9000 audit."

Looking at his laptop PC, Dogbert says, "Basically, you give me money and I tell you that you're a bunch of dolts. It's the perfect job for me."

Dogbert continues, "Tell me what you do here, Alice, if that's your real name."

Alice replies, "I'm an engineer. I make slides that people can't read. Sometimes I eat donuts."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

I'VE BEEN HIRED BY YOUR COMPANY TO PERFORM AN ISO 9000 AUDIT.

BASICALLY, YOU GIVE ME MONEY AND I TELL YOU THAT YOU'RE A BUNCH OF DOLTS.

IT'S THE PERFECT JOB FOR ME.

TELL ME WHAT YOU DO HERE, ALICE, IF THAT'S YOUR REAL NAME., I'M AN ENGINEER.

I MAKE SLIDES THAT PEOPLE CAN'T READ.

SOMETIMES I EAT DONUTS.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Comic Strip Title: "The Perfect Job"

Summary:

The comic strip, originally published in 'Dilbert', features a humorous exchange between an employee and a potential employer. The employee is seeking a job as an ISO 9000 auditor, but the employer is more interested in the employee's skills as a dog.

Key Points:

• The employee is hired by the company to perform an ISO 9000 audit.
• The employer asks the employee to tell them what they do, and the employee responds with a list of skills, including making slides that people can't read.
• The employer is impressed by the employee's ability to eat donuts and asks if that's their real name.
• The employee is confused by the employer's questions and responds with a list of skills, including making slides that people can't read.
• The employer is satisfied with the employee's response and offers them the job.

Humor:

The comic strip uses humor to highlight the absurdity of the situation, where an employee is being hired based on their ability to eat donuts and make slides that people can't read. The employer's questions and the employee's responses are both ridiculous and amusing, making for a humorous exchange.

generated by llama-3.2-11b-vision-instruct

Accompanying textual content, such as title, tags and transcripts, is shown here if we have it. Not every comic has all of these, and they seem to be a bit hit and miss even on the official website.