Dilbert cartoon first published on Saturday 25th July 1998

Dilbert//3388, first published 28 years ago on Saturday 25th July 1998

Tags

management secrets earthling fulltime aliens ufo plowed into alp sharing skills boss and aliens

Official transcript

The Boss is naked in a prison tube on an alien spacecraft. Two aliens outside the tube. One says, "Tell us your management secrets, earthling."

The Boss responds, "You have too many full-time aliens flying this UFO. Downsize half of them, then roll out the ISO 9001 process."

Back in the office, Dilbert and Alice listen as The Boss, who is supported by crutches and has a perplexed look on his face, finishes his story. "...But despite all of my help, they still plowed into a snow-covered alp."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

TELL US YOUR MANAGEMENT SECRETS, EARTHLING.

YOU HAVE TOO MANY FULL-TIME ALIENS FLYING THIS UFO.

DOWNSIZE HALF OF THEM, THEN ROLL OUT THE ISO 9001 PROCESS.

... BUT DESPITE ALL OF MY HELP, THEY STILL PLOWED INTO A SNOW-COVERED ALP.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Comic Strip Title: "Alien Management"

Summary:

The comic strip revolves around an alien who visits Earth to discuss management secrets with Dilbert. The alien's advice is to downsize the UFO workforce by half and implement the ISO 9001 process. Despite the alien's help, the snow-covered Alps are still plowed into a snow-covered ALP.

Key Points:

• The alien offers management advice to Dilbert.
• The alien suggests downsizing the UFO workforce by half and implementing the ISO 9001 process.
• Despite the alien's help, the snow-covered Alps are still plowed into a snow-covered ALP.
• The comic strip pokes fun at the idea of seeking management advice from an alien.

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