Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 10th December 2000

Dilbert//4257, first published 26 years ago on Sunday 10th December 2000

Tags

doing it wrong response time sub second two seconds always right never wrong screaming

Official transcript

Noriko says to Dilbert, "And we'll have sub-second response time. Dilbert says to Noriko, "Actually, it's already two seconds, and your change will add two more."

Noriko exclaims to Dilbert, "Why do you always have to be right?!"

Noriko says to Dilbert, "Just once can't you admit I'm right?"

Dilbert says, "Okay, I admit that two plus two equals less than one."

Noriko says, "I don't mean now, jerk. I mean in general."

Dilbert says, "Okay. In general I admit that the rules of physics are optional."

Noriko exclaims, "You're doing it wrong!!"

Dilbert says, "You're right. My fault again."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

AND WE'LL HAVE SUB-SECOND RESPONSE TIME.

ACTUALLY, IT'S ALREADY TWO SECONDS, AND YOUR CHANGE WILL ADD TWO MORE.

WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE RIGHT?!

JUST ONCE CAN'T YOU ADMIT I'M RIGHT?

OKAY, I ADMIT THAT TWO PLUS TWO EQUALS LESS THAN ONE.

I DON'T MEAN NOW, JERK. I MEAN IN GENERAL.

OKAY. IN GENERAL I ADMIT THAT THE RULES OF PHYSICS ARE OPTIONAL.

YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!!

YOU'RE RIGHT.

MY FAULT AGAIN.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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