Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 13th May 2001

Dilbert//4411, first published 25 years ago on Sunday 13th May 2001

Tags

carol connections in war zones flights good rating humilation parkside strangler phone messages press conference secretary vague objectives complaining

Official transcript

Carol sits across from the Boss, who says, "Carol, your overall performance rating is 'good.'"

Carol screams, "AAAG! Good is bad! What did I do to deserve this humiliation?"

The Boss replies, "Well, you gave me six hundred phone messages that said, 'It might have been Bob.'"

Carol furiously replies, "You can't tell me that none of them were from a Bob."

The Boss continues, "You arranged for all of my flights to have connections in war zones."

Carol throws up her arms and says, "Excuse me for trying to save the company some money."

The Boss says, "You held a press conference to announce that I was the Parkside Strangler."

Later, Carol tells Wally, "And he refuses to take any responsibility for giving me vague objectives."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

CAROL, YOUR OVERALL PERFORMANCE RATING IS "GOOD." AAAG! GOOD IS BAD! WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS HUMILIATION WELL, YOU GAVE ME SIX HUNDRED PHONE MESSAGES THAT SAID.

"IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN BOB. " YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT NONE OF THEM WERE FROM A BOB!

YOU ARRANGED FOR ALL OF MY FLIGHTS TO HAVE CONNECTIONS IN WAR ZONES.

EXCUSE ME FOR TRYING TO SAVE THE COMPANY SOME MONEY.

YOU HELD A PRESS CONFERENCE TO ANNOUNCE THAT I WAS THE PARKSIDE STRANGLER.

AND HE REFUSES TO TAKE ANY RESPONSIBILITY FOR GIVING ME VAGUE OBJECTIVES.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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