Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 3rd June 2001

Dilbert//4432, first published 25 years ago on Sunday 3rd June 2001

Tags

save money firings consultants flossie highly technical work invitation shake hands greeting ritual brain overload raise rates over reacts dumb woman lost freak new hire

Official transcript

The Boss comes into Brian's cubicle and says, "I'm sorry, Brian. I have to fire all my consultants to save money."

Brian turns to the Boss and asks, "Who will do your highly technical work?"

The Boss brings in a woman and says to Brian, "You can transfer all your knowledge to Flossie."

Brian holds out his hand to shake hands and says, "Hi."

Flossie grips a pencil in her hand and says, "What's with the hand? Do you want to borrow my pencil?"

Brian replies, "Um...no. This is an invitation to shake hands. It's a greeting ritual."

Flossie grabs her head and shouts, "OUCH!! Brain overload!! It's too much information!!"

Flossie puts both hands on either side of her head and repeats, "Purge! Purge! Purge!"

Flossie stares at Brian blankly and says calmly, "Where am I?"

Brian thinks to himself, "I need to raise my rates."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

I'M SORRY, BRIAN.

I NEED TO FIRE ALL OF MY CONSULTANTS TO SAVE MONEY.

WHO WILL DO YOUR HIGHLY TECHNICAL WORK?

YOU CAN TRANSFER YOUR KNOWLEDGE TO FLOSSIE.

WHAT'S WITH THE HAND? DO YOU WANT TO BORROW MY PENCIL?

UM... NO. THIS IS AN INVITATION TO SHAKE HANDS. IT'S A GREETING RITUAL OUCH!! BRAIN OVERLOAD!! IT'S TOO MUCH INFORMATION!!

PURGE!

PURGE!

PURGE!

WHERE AM I?

I NEED TO RAISE MY RATES

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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