Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 20th March 2011

Dilbert//8009, first published fifteen years ago on Sunday 20th March 2011

Tags

laziness meetings buddha jogging reliability stats data does not exist random numbers deep understanding of reality

Official transcript

The Boss says, "Asok, get me the reliability stats for our previous model."

Asok says, "I am fairly certain the data does not exist."

The Boss says, "Wally can show you how to get it."

Wally says, "Come with me."

Wally says, "You start by typing random numbers into a spreadsheet."

Asok says,"Then what?"

Wally says, "Then you're done."

Wally says, "All business data is intentionally misleading. I just take it to the next level."

Wally says, "A deep understanding of reality is exactly the same thing as laziness."

Asok says, "That can't be right."

Wally says, "Have you ever seen a statue of Buddha jogging?"

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

ASOK, GET ME THE RELIABILITY STATS FOR OUR PREVIOUS MODEL.

DILBERT SCOTT ADAMS dilbert.com I AM FAIRLY CERTAIN THE DATA DOES NOT EXIST.

WALLY CAN SHOW YOU HOW TO GET IT.

COME YOU START BY TYPING RANDOM NUMBERS INTO A SPREADSHEET.

THEN WHAT?

THEN YOU'RE DONE.

ALL BUSINESS DATA IS INTENTIONALLY MISLEADING. I JUST TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL.

WITH ME.

A DEEP UNDERSTAND ING OF REALITY IS EXACTLY THE SAME THING AS LAZINESS.

CLICK CLICK CLICK CLICK CLICK THAT CANT BE RIGHT.

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A STATUE OF BUDDHA JOGGING?

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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