Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 4th March 2018

Dilbert//10550, first published eight years ago on Sunday 4th March 2018

Tags

add code, corporate scamming, darkest day, designed new prodcut, draft apology, engineering success, make unrelaible, no upgarde, press release, ten years

Official transcript

Dilbert: Ive designed our new product to work flawlessly for up to ten years.

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

IVE DESIGNED OUR NEW PRODUCT TO WORK FLAWLESSLY FOR UP TO TEN YEARS.

NO ONE WILL NEED AN UPGRADE. THAT'S NO GOOD.

ADD SOME CODE TO SLOW IT DOWN AND MAKE IT UNRELIABLE AFTER TWO YEARS.

BUT MAKE SURE THE DEVICE DOESN'T SLOW DOWN UNTIL WE HAVE AN UPGRADE TO SELL.

THEN DRAFT AN APOLOGY I CAN PUT IN A PRESS RELEASE WHEN WE GET CAUGHT.

YOU HAVE TURNED MY ENGINEERING SUCCESS INTO THE DARKEST DAY OF MY CAREER.

THAT'S NOT EVEN CLOSE TO BEING TRUE.

YOUR DARKEST DAY WILL BE WHEN THE PRESS FIGURES OUT WHAT WE DID AND I FIRE YOU FOR IT.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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