Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 28th May 1995

Dilbert//2234, first published 31 years ago on Sunday 28th May 1995

Tags

putting in charge biff big improvements for free recommend ways increase profit spend mpney make money more money so called report tomorrow lava lamps few bucks

Official transcript

The Boss enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "I'm putting you in charge of project 'BIFF.'"

The Boss says "'BIFF' stands for 'Big Improvements For Free.'"

The Boss says, "Your job is to recommend ways to increase profits without spending money or changing anything."

Dilbert says, "You have to spend money to make money."

The Boss says, "If we HAD money to spend we wouldn't need to MAKE money. Duh."

Dilbert says, "The point is that you can make MORE money than you spend."

The Boss says, "I'm not following your so-called 'point.'"

The Boss says, "Logically, anything I don't understand is unimportant. Have your report tomorrow."

The Boss sits at his desk, holding Dilbert's report. The Boss says, "So, you recommend . . . Replacing all managers with lava lamps."

Dilbert reaches into his pocket and says, "Here's a few bucks for the lava lamps."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

IM PUTTING YOU IN CHARGE OF PROJECT "BIFF." DILBERT "BIFF" STANDS FOR "BIG IMPROVEMENTS FOR FREE." YOUR JOB IS TO RECOMMEND WAYS TO INCREASE PROFITS WITHOUT SPENDING MONEY OR CHANGING ANYTHING.

YOU HAVE TO SPEND MONEY TO MAKE MONEY.

IF WE HAD MONEY TO SPEND WE WOULDN T NEED TO MAKE MONEY.

THE POINT IS THAT YOU CAN MAKE MORE MONEY THAN YOU SPEND I'M NOT FOLLOWING YOUR SO-CALLED "POINT." LOGICALLY, ANYTHING I DON'T UNDERSTAND IS UNIMPORTANT.

HAVE YOUR REPORT TOMORROW.

SO, YOU RECOMMEND...

REPLACING ALL MANAGERS WITH LAVA LAMPS.

HERE'S A FEW BUCKS FOR THE LAVA LAMPS

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Title: "Biff's Big Improvements"

Summary:

The comic strip features Biff, a man with a distinctive hairstyle, as the main character. He is tasked with implementing "big improvements for free" by his boss, who is also named Biff.

Key Points:

• Biff's boss assigns him to find ways to increase profits without spending money or making changes.
• Biff recommends replacing all managers with lava lamps, citing their ability to "make money" and "improve the work environment."
• The boss is skeptical of Biff's proposal but agrees to consider it.
• The comic strip pokes fun at the idea of seeking to increase profits without investing in the business or making any changes.

Overall:

The comic strip uses humor to highlight the absurdity of trying to achieve success without putting in any effort or investing in the business. It also showcases the creativity and unconventional thinking of the character Biff.

generated by llama-3.2-11b-vision-instruct

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