Dilbert cartoon first published on Monday 24th June 1996

Dilbert//2627, first published thirty years ago on Monday 24th June 1996

Tags

new objectoves achievable objectives approved measurable

Official transcript

Alice hands the Boss a document and says, "Here's a draft of my new objectives. I tried to make them achievable."

The Boss reads, "No matter how stupid my co-workers are, I will not punch a hole in anyone's torso, rip out a vital organ and keep it in my cubicle as a warning to others."

Outside the Boss's office, Wally says to Dilbert, "I hope she gets those objectives approved."

Inside the office, Alice yells, "Yes! It's measurable!"

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

HERE'S A DRAFT OF MY NEW OBJECTIVES. I TRIED TO MAKE THEM ACHIEVABLE.

"NO MATTER HOW STUPID MY COWORKERS ARE, I WILL NOT PUNCH A HOLE IN ANYONE'S TORSO, RIP OUT A VITAL ORGAN AND KEEP IT IN MY CUBICLE AS A WARNING TO OTHERS." I HOPE SHE GETS THOSE OBJECTIVES APPROVED.

YES! IT'S MEASURABLE!

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Comic Strip Title: "Measurable Objectives"

Summary:

The comic strip revolves around a company's new initiative to set measurable objectives. The story unfolds as follows:

• The boss presents a draft of the objectives, which include making coworkers punch holes in each other's torsos, ripping out vital organs, and keeping them in cubicles as warnings to others.
• The employees are shocked and horrified by the proposal.
• One employee, who is a scientist, suggests that the objectives can be made measurable by counting the number of holes punched and organs ripped out.
• The boss agrees, and the objectives are approved.

Key Takeaways:

• The comic strip satirizes the idea of setting unrealistic and absurd objectives in a workplace setting.
• It highlights the importance of having clear and achievable goals.
• The strip also pokes fun at the tendency of some companies to prioritize profits over employee well-being and safety.

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