Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 10th November 1996

Dilbert//2766, first published thirty years ago on Sunday 10th November 1996

Tags

offered pormotion another department snail crud fantasy reality current assignment too valuable comapny raise valuable assignment why low morale breath

Official transcript

Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk and says, "I've been offered a promotion in another department."

The caption says, "Fantasy."

Dilbert says, "I'm outta here, you worthless piece of snail crud!!"

Dilbert laughs wickedly. The caption says, "Reality."

Dilbert says, "I meekly request to be released from my current assignment."

The caption says, "Fantasy."

The Boss says, "I would never stand in your way. Congratulations!"

The caption says, "Reality."

The Boss says, "I can't release you. You're too valuable."

The caption says, "Fantasy."

Dilbert pulls the Boss's tie and says, "If I'm so valuable, explain my last raise!!!"

The caption says, "Reality."

The Boss says, "In fact, I have ANOTHER valuable assignment for you."

Dilbert stands in stunned silence. Dilbert tells Wally, I'm doing a survey to find out why morale is so low."

Wally replies, "I think it's your breath."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

I'VE BEEN OFFERED A PROMOTION IN ANOTHER DEPARTMENT.

FANTASY I'M OUTTA HERE, YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SNAIL CRUD!!


REALITY I MEEKLY REQUEST TO BE RELEASED FROM MY CURRENT ASSIGNMENT.

FANTASY I WOULD NEVER STAND IN YOUR WAY.

CONGRATULATIONS!

REALITY I CAN'T RELEASE YOU.

YOU'RE TOO VALUABLE.

FANTASY IF I'M SO VALUABLE, EXPLAIN MY LAST RAISE!!!

REALITY IN FACT, I HAVE ANOTHER VALUABLE ASSIGNMENT FOR YOU.

STUNNED SILENCE I'M DOING A SURVEY TO FIND OUT WHY MORALE IS SO LOW.

I THINK IT'S YOUR BREATH.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Comic Strip Title: "Promotion to Nowhere"

Summary:

The comic strip, originally published in 1996, features Dilbert, a bespectacled man with a distinctive appearance, in a series of humorous and relatable scenarios. The strip is divided into six panels, each depicting a different conversation between Dilbert and his boss.

Panel 1: Dilbert is informed that he has been offered a promotion in another department. His response is met with skepticism, as he points out that he is already out of his current department.

Panel 2: Dilbert's boss attempts to reassure him, stating that he is "worthless" and that the promotion is a "piece of snail crud." Dilbert responds with laughter, implying that he is not impressed by the offer.

Panel 3: Dilbert's boss becomes defensive, asking if he is so valuable that he should be given a raise. Dilbert's response is lighthearted, suggesting that he is indeed valuable, but not enough to warrant a promotion to a department that doesn't exist.

Panel 4: Dilbert's boss becomes increasingly frustrated, asking if he is so valuable that he should be released from his current assignment. Dilbert's response is nonchalant, implying that he is not concerned about his current assignment.

Panel 5: Dilbert's boss becomes desperate, asking if he is so valuable that he should be given another valuable assignment. Dilbert's response is sarcastic, suggesting that he is not interested in another assignment.

Panel 6: Dilbert's boss finally gives up, admitting that he is doing a survey to find out why morale is so low. Dilbert's response is humorous, implying that his boss is not very good at his job.

Overall, the comic strip pokes fun at the absurdity of corporate promotions and the often-humorous interactions between employees and their bosses. The strip's relatable characters and witty dialogue make it a humorous and entertaining read.

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