Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 31st January 1999

Dilbert//3578, first published 27 years ago on Sunday 31st January 1999

Tags

strategic plan secret trust soabotage warranty chair

Official transcript

Dilbert is in the boss' office. The boss says, "Make your report consistent with our strategic plan."

Dilbert says, "What's out strategic plan?"

The boss says, "It's a secret."

Dilbert says, "Are you saying you don't trust me?"

The boss says, "I don't think it's a coincidence that most employee sabotage is done by employees."

Dilbert says, "How can I do my report if I don't know the strategy?! The boss says, "Okay, okay. I'll let you glance at it."

The boss pulls a piece of paper out of his desk. The boss barely lets Dilbert see the paper. The boss says, "Time's up! That's long enough!"

Dilbert says, "That's the warranty for your chair."

The boss says, "Really? I've been managing to this for years."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

MAKE YOUR REPORT CONSISTENT WITH OUR STRATEGIC PLAN.

WHAT'S OUR STRATEGIC PLAN?

IT'S A SECRET.

ARE YOU SAYING YOU DON'T TRUST ?

I DON'T THINK IT'S A COINCIDENCE THAT MOST EMPLOYEE SABOTAGE IS DONE BY EMPLOYEES.

HOW CAN I DO MY REPORT IF I DON'T KNOW THE STRATEGY?!

OKAY, OKAY I'LL LET YOU GLANCE AT IT.

TIME'S UP!

THAT'S LONG ENOUGH!

THAT'S THE WARRANTY FOR YOUR CHAIR.

REALLY?

I'VE BEEN MANAGING TO THIS FOR YEARS.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Title: "The Strategic Plan"

Summary:

The comic strip, originally published in 1999, revolves around a conversation between Dilbert and his boss. Dilbert's boss asks him to make his report consistent with their strategic plan, prompting Dilbert to inquire about the plan's nature. The boss reveals that it's a secret, leaving Dilbert perplexed.

Dilbert expresses his skepticism, stating that the plan's secrecy is likely a result of employee sabotage. His boss reassures him that it's a coincidence and that Dilbert is doing a good job. However, the boss's assurance is undermined when he reveals that he has been managing the chair for years, implying a lack of trust in Dilbert's abilities.

The conversation ends with Dilbert asking how he can do his report if he doesn't know the strategy, and the boss responding that he'll let him glance at it. The exchange highlights the absurdity of corporate bureaucracy and the lack of transparency in decision-making processes.

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