Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 18th April 1999

Dilbert//3655, first published 27 years ago on Sunday 18th April 1999

Tags

process manager process poorly manged intern no process voted out of meeting annoying

Official transcript

Wally, Dilbert, the Boss, and others are in a meeting. The Boss introduces the woman next to him to the group. The Boss says, "Patty is our new 'process manager.'"

The Boss continues, "Patty doesn't know how to DO anything."

He adds, "She only knows how to do things BETTER!"

Patty raises a finger, "Process!"

Patty says, "For example, this meeting is poorly managed because you have no process."

Patty, turning to Asok, continues, "And this intern obviously had no process for deciding whether to attend."

The Boss raises his hand. He addresses the group, "Okay, Patty is annoying. All in favor of getting rid of her."

The entire group, except for Patty, raises their hands. Asok looks like he's going to strangle her. As they all leave the meeting behind the dejected Patty, Dilbert says to her, "You lasted longer than Timmy the 'Facilitator.'"

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

PATTY IS OUR NEW "PROCESS MANAGER." PATTY DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO DO ANYTHING.

SHE ONLY KNOWS HOW TO DO THINGS BETTER!

PROCESS!

FOR EXAMPLE, THIS MEETING IS POORLY MANAGED BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO PROCESS.

AND THIS INTERN OBVIOUSLY HAD NO PROCESS FOR DECIDING WHETHER TO ATTEND.

OKAY, PATTY IS ANNOYING.

ALL IN FAVOR OF GETTING RID OF HER YOU LASTED LONGER THAN TIMMY THE "FACILITATOR."

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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