Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 20th May 2001

Dilbert//4418, first published 25 years ago on Sunday 20th May 2001

Tags

behind the door busy aisel counsel counseling cubicle jittery jumpy looking over shoulder most instinct near doorway realx zombie

Official transcript

The Boss brings an employee into Catbert. The employee is bug-eyed and nervous looking. The Boss says, "This is Jittery Jeff. He needs counseling."

The Boss continues as Jittery Jeff whips his head around, "I put him in a cubicle at the end of a busy aisle near a doorway."

The Boss tells Catbert, "Now he's jittery because he thinks people are always looking over his shoulder."

Catbert stands on the desk and says, "Leave him here. I'll counsel him up."

Jittery Jeff sits down but continues to whip his head around. Catbert says, "Relax Jittery Jeff...It's okay now."

Jeff begins to calm down as Catbert repeats, "Relax, relax, relax, relax."

Suddenly, Catbert screams, "AAAGH!! Someone is behind the door!!"

Jittery Jeff jumps up. Jittery Jeff lays slumped in his chair with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. Catbert tells the Boss, "Counseling is mostly instinct."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

THIS IS JITTERY JEFF. HE NEEDS COUNSELING.

I PUT HIM IN A CUBICLE AT THE END OF A BUSY AISLE NEAR A DOORWAY.

NOW HE'S JITTERY BECAUSE HE THINKS PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS LOOKING OVER HIS SHOULDER.

LEAVE HIM HERE. I'LL COUNSEL HIM UP.

RELAX, JITTERY JEFF... IT'S OKAY NOW.

RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX AAAGH!!

SOMEONE IS BEHIND THE DOOR!!

COUNSELING IS MOSTLY INSTINCT.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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