Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 14th April 2002

Dilbert//4747, first published 24 years ago on Sunday 14th April 2002

Tags

little people allowed strategy decisions project opal executive intuition budget cut opal project named after daughter increase budget secret meetings decision makers

Official transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "All the important decision-makers in the company in this room."

The Boss continues, "No little people are allowed because we'll be making important strategy decisions."

The Boss continues, "First, let's make decisions about project Opal."

The Boss continues, "Does anyone know what the project is or what we need to decide?"

A man raises his hand and says, "My executive intuition tells me we should cut the budget by 10%."

Another man turns to him and says, "I think Opal is one of your projects. It's named after your daughter."

The first speaker grabs his own head and says, "Wait.. a new intuition is coming in now... it says to increase the budget."

Dilbert asks the Boss, "Why are those meetings secret?"

The Boss replies, "You don't want to know."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

ALL THE IMPORTANT DECISION- MAKERS IN THE COMPANY ARE IN THIS ROOM.

NO LITTLE PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED BECAUSE WE'LL BE MAKING IMPORTANT STRATEGY DECISIONS.

FIRST, LET'S MAKE DECISIONS ABOUT PROJECT OPAL.

DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT THE PROJECT IS OR WHAT WE NEED TO DECIDE?

MY EXECUTIVE INTUITION TELLS ME WE SHOULD CUT THE BUDGET BY 10%.

I THINK OPAL IS ONE OF YOUR PROJECTS.

IT'S NAMED AFTER YOUR DAUGHTER.

DOPAL WAIT... A NEW INTUITION IS COMING IN NOW...

IT SAYS TO INCREASE THE BUDGET.

WHY ARE THOSE MEETINGS SECRET?

YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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