Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 23rd March 2003

Dilbert//5090, first published 23 years ago on Sunday 23rd March 2003

Tags

new marketing strategy past cutomers flu symptoms sick people appeal to sick people reinvent dead horse duh- mensuon floating scared darkness confusing cause & effect

Official transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "Jimmy will explain our new marketing strategy."

Jimmy says, "A study of past customers shows that 96% of them have flu symptoms."

Jimmy continues, "Apparently, sick people are the most likely to buy from us. We don't know why."

Jimmy points to a slide of an ill man and says, "So we redesigned our ad campaign to appeal to sick people."

Alice says to Jimmy, "You're confusing cause and effect. Your study shows that our products make people sick."

Jimmy responds, "Alice, let's not reinvent a dead horse."

Alice panics and says, "Suddenly nothing makes sense.. I must have slipped into the meeting duh-mension!"

Alice leans back in a daze and says, "Floating.. Scared.. Darkness."

The Boss says, "This usually lasts about 10 minutes."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

JIMMY WILL EXPLAIN OUR NEW MARKETING STRATEGY.

A STUDY OF PAST CUSTOMERS SHOWS THAT 96% OF THEM HAVE FLU SYMPTOMS.

APPARENTLY, SICK PEOPLE ARE THE MOST LIKELY TO BUY FROM US. WE DON'T KNOW WHY.

SO WE REDESIGNED OUR AD CAMPAIGN TO APPEAL TO SICK PEOPLE.

YOU'RE CONFUSING CAUSE AND EFFECT.

YOUR STUDY SHOWS THAT OUR PRODUCTS MAKE PEOPLE SICK.

ALICE, LET'S NOT REINVENT A DEAD HORSE.

00.

SUDDENLY NOTHING MAKES SENSE...I MUST HAVE SLIPPED INTO THE MEETING DUH- MENSION!

THIS USUALLY LASTS ABOUT TEN MINUTES.

FLOATING..

SCARED...

DARKNESS.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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