Back to today

Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 14th March 2004

Dilbert//5447, first published 22 years ago on Sunday 14th March 2004


Tags

day off gerbil heartless horrible person insensitive mean sisters weight toss in casket twin sister death


Official transcript

"I need a day off to attend my twin sister's funeral."

originally published on dilbert.com


Open source transcript

I NEED A DAY OFF TO ATTEND MY TWIN SISTER'S FUNERAL.

A WHOLE DAY??

HOW WELL DID YOU KNOW HER?

SHE WAS MY.

TWIN.

BUT NOT IDENTICAL!

HOW DOES THAT MATTER?

WELL... SHE DIDN'T EVEN LOOK LIKE YOU.

AND YET YOU WANT A WHOLE DAY OFF FOR A SERVICE THAT TAKES FIFTEEN MINUTES.

GAAA!!! IT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE TO BE MORE INSENSITIVE!!!!

I'LL COMPROMISE.

MY PET GERBIL IS ON HIS LAST LEGS. I'LL GIVE YOU THE DAY OFF IF YOU TOSS HIM IN THE CASKET SO I DON'T HAVE TO BURY HIM MYSELF.

WHEN DO YOU THINK IT WILL DIE?

DEPENDS.

HOW MUCH DOES YOUR SISTER WEIGH?

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive


Accompanying textual content, such as title, tags and transcripts, is shown here if we have it. Not every comic has all of these, and they seem to be a bit hit and miss even on the official website.

Jokes and Humour