Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 20th January 2008

Dilbert//6854, first published eighteen years ago on Sunday 20th January 2008

Tags

human resources hr person evil director bad attitude project corpse of misery donated brain gum museum mental imbalance clarity irrational employee moral festival won meeting business

Official transcript

Catbert: Evil director of human resources "Your boss says you have a bad attitude."

"That's because my project is a flailing corpse of misery, and my boss donated his brain to a gum museum."

If I had a good attitude in this situation, it would be a sign of a mental imbalance."

"My bad attitude is proof that I am thinking clearly."

"Are you going to compliment me on my clarity or demand I be irrational?"

"I'm putting you in charge of the employee morale festival."

"I have a sudden urge to grab you by the tail and beat myself to death."

"That's how I know I won the meeting."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

CATBERT: EVIL DIRECTOR OF HUMAN RESOURCES YOUR BOSS SAYS YOU HAVE A BAD ATTITUDE.

THAT'S BECAUSE MY PROJECT IS A FLAILING CORPSE OF MISERY, AND MY BOSS DONATED HIS BRAIN TO A GUM MUSEUM.

IF I HAD A GOOD ATTITUDE IN THIS SITUATION, IT WOULD BE A SIGN OF MENTAL IMBALANCE.

MY BAD ATTITUDE IS PROOF THAT I AM THINKING CLEARLY.

ARE YOU GOING TO COMPLIMENT ME ON MY CLARITY OR DEMAND I BE IRRATIONAL?

IM PUTTING YOU IN CHARGE OF THE EMPLOYEE MORALE FESTIVAL.

I HAVE A SUDDEN URGE TO GRAB YOU BY THE TAIL AND BEAT MYSELF TO DEATH.

THAT'S HOW I KNOW I WON THE MEETING.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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