Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 15th March 2015

Dilbert//9465, first published 11 years ago on Sunday 15th March 2015

Tags

executives, ceos, raise, asking for a raise, compensation, money, wages, comparison, wage discrepancy, mansion

Official transcript

Boss: I can only give you a 3% raise. If you want more, take it up with our CEO. Dilbert: I'd like to explain why I deserve more than a 3% raise. As a negotiating strategy, Dogbert will simultaneously read a media report about your lavish $85 million mansion. I invented three new technologies this year. Dogbert: "The toilets are solid gold."

Dilbert: I wrote most of the code for our new product. Dogbert: "The helicopter pad is on the roof of the car museum."

Dilbert: I worked eighty hours per week. Dogbert: "Every elevator has a full kitchen."

Dilbert: I could earn more at Google or Apple... Dogbert: "Entire house rotates for optimal sun exposure."

Dilbert: Do you see where I'm going with this? CEO: High-five?

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

I CAN ONLY GIVE YOU A 3% RAISE. IF YOU WANT MORE, TAKE IT UP WITH OUR CEO.

I'D LIKE TO EXPLAIN WHY I DESERVE MORE THAN A 3% RAISE.

AS A NEGOTIATING STRATEGY, DOGBERT WILL SIMULTANEOUSLY READ A MEDIA REPORT ABOUT YOUR LAVISH $85 MILLION MANSION.

I INVENTED THREE NEW TECHNOLOGIES THIS YEAR.

"THE TOILETS ARE SOLID GOLD." I WROTE MOST OF THE CODE FOR OUR MAIN PRODUCT.

"THE HELICOPTER PAD IS ON THE ROOMUSEUM. CAR I WORKED EIGHTY HOURS PER WEEK.

"EVERY ELEVATOR HAS A FULL KITCHEN." I COULD EARN MORE AT GOOGLE OR APPLE.

"ENTIRE HOUSE ROTATES FOR OPTIMAL SUN EXPOSURE.

DO YOU SEE WHERE IM GOING WITH THIS?

HIGH- FIVE?

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Comic Strip Title: "A 3% Raise"

Summary:

The comic strip, originally published in 2015, revolves around Dilbert's quest for a 3% raise. The story unfolds as follows:

• Dilbert approaches his CEO, requesting a 3% raise.
• The CEO responds by offering a 3% raise, but only if Dilbert takes it up with the company's CEO.
• Dilbert meets with the CEO, who refuses to grant him a 3% raise.
• Dilbert then meets with the company's CEO, who agrees to grant him a 3% raise.
• However, the CEO also reveals that he has been working on a new technology that will make toilets solid gold.
• Dilbert is unimpressed by this revelation and continues to push for a higher raise.
• The CEO eventually agrees to grant Dilbert a higher raise, but only if he can come up with a new strategy.
• Dilbert comes up with a plan to increase the company's earnings by $85 million, which the CEO accepts.
• The comic strip concludes with Dilbert celebrating his success and the CEO wondering where he will be going with the new technology.

Key Takeaways:

• The comic strip highlights the challenges of negotiating for a raise and the importance of having a strong strategy.
• It also pokes fun at the idea of using technology to make toilets solid gold, emphasizing the absurdity of some corporate goals.

generated by llama-3.2-11b-vision-instruct

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