Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 12th December 1993

Dilbert//1702, first published 33 years ago on Sunday 12th December 1993

Tags

dogbert alice space computer office case study todd allen men

Official transcript

Dogbert holds a pointer and says, "Today you will learn how to deal with people who have personality defects."

The caption says, "Case 1: Todd laughs nervously at every one of his own comments."

Todd says, "Don't hold it against me! Hee hee!"

The caption says, "Remedy: Todd must be relocated to a distant planet."

A space shuttle leaves a planet. On the planet's surface, Todd says, "It sure is lonely! Hee hee! The caption says, "Case 2: Allen stares at you like a zombie for long periods before responding to questions."

The caption says, "Remedy: Allen must be paired with Virginia (Case 3) who fills all quiet spots with inane chatter."

Dogbert pushes Virgina toward Allen. The caption says, "Case 4: Matt speaks slowly about amazingly boring topics."

Matt says, "I . . . ate . . . a . . . pickle . . ."

The caption says, "Remedy: Matt's head can be outfitted with a reading stand."

A man reads a book that rests on Matt's head. Matt says, "I . . . like . . . pickles . . ."

The caption says, "Case 5: An engineer. Remedy: Very quietly seal him in his own cubicle."

Dogbert builds a brick wall in the door of Dilbert's cubicle.

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

TODAY YOU WILL LEARN HOW TO DEAL WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE PERSONALITY DEFECTS.

CASE 1: TODD LAUGHS NERVOUSLY AT EVERY ONE OF HIS OWN COMMENTS.

DON'T HOLD IT AGAINST ME!

HEE HEE HAW HAW!

REMEDY: TODD MUST BE RELOCATED TO A DISTANT PLANET.

IT SURE IS LONELY!

HEE HEE!

1383 CASE 2: ALLEN STARES AT YOU LIKE A ZOMBIE FOR LONG PERIODS BEFORE RESPONDING TO QUESTIONS.

REMEDY: ALLEN MUST BE PAIRED WITH VIRGINIA (CASE 3) WHO FILLS ALL QUIET SPOTS WITH INANE CHATTER.

YAK YAK CASE 4: MATT SPEAKS SLOWLY ABOUT AMAZINGLY BORING TOPICS.

.. ATE PICKLE..

REMEDY: MATT'S HEAD CAN BE OUTFITTED WITH A READING STAND.

LIKE PICKLES.

CASE 5: AN ENGINEER.

REMEDY: VERY QUIETLY SEAL HIM IN HIS OWN CUBICLE.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Comic Strip Title: "Personality Defects"

Summary:

This comic strip, originally published in 1993, humorously explores the concept of personality defects and their effects on individuals. The strip is divided into five cases, each featuring a different character with a unique personality defect.

Case 1: Todd's Nervousness

• Todd laughs nervously at every comment, making him appear awkward and uncomfortable.
• His nervous laughter is contagious, causing others to join in.

Case 2: Allen's Zombie-Like Behavior

• Allen stares at people for long periods before responding to questions, giving the impression that he is a zombie.
• His behavior is so unusual that it becomes a topic of conversation.

Case 3: Virginia's Inane Chatter

• Virginia fills all quiet spots with inane chatter, making her seem annoying and pointless.
• Her constant talking is a source of frustration for those around her.

Case 4: Matt's Boring Topics

• Matt speaks slowly about amazingly boring topics, making him seem dull and uninteresting.
• His conversations are so dry that they put others to sleep.

Case 5: The Engineer's Sealing Habits

• The engineer seals himself in his own cubicle, making him seem isolated and disconnected from others.
• His behavior is so extreme that it becomes a topic of discussion among his colleagues.

Overall, the comic strip pokes fun at the quirks and flaws of human personality, highlighting how they can impact our relationships and interactions with others.

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