Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 12th January 1997

Dilbert//2829, first published 29 years ago on Sunday 12th January 1997

Tags

buying car touch negotiator suggested retail price invisible spary scurvy tax audits airbag gravel lease terms engraved hood ornamnet

Official transcript

The caption says, "Buying a car."

Dilbert sits across from a car salesman's desk. The salesman says, "You're one tough negotiator."

Dilbert replies, "Thanks."

The salesman says, "It only took you four hours to get me all the way down to the manufacturer's suggested retail price."

The salesman cries, "There's no profit left!! My family will go hungry!!"

The man bawls. The salesman stops crying and says, "Sorry. I assume you want the rust inhibitor coating for only $500."

Dilbert replies, "Um . . .Yeah. Rust is bad."

The man jumps up and shouts, "Yes!! Ka-ching ka-ching!"

The salesman says, "Sorry. We also have an invisible spray that protects against scurvy and tax audits."

Dilbert replies, "Well . . . Okay."

The salesman says, "Initial here if you want your airbag to be full of fresh aspen air instead of gravel."

Dilbert reads the contract and says, "Only $600."

Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, "And the lease terms are engraved on this free hood ornament!"

Dogbert replies, "Be glad they didn't install it."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

BUYING A CAR YOU'RE ONE TOUGH NEGOTIATOR.

THANKS.

IT ONLY TOOK YOU FOUR HOURS TO GET ME ALL THE WAY DOWN TO THE MANUFACTURER'S SUGGESTED RETAIL PRICE.

THERE'S NO PROFIT LEFT!! MY FAMILY WILL GO HUNGRY!!

BWAA! BWAA!

00 p SORRY I ASSUME YOU WANT THE RUST INHIBITOR COATING FOR ONLY $ 500 UM...

YEAH.

RUST IS BAD.

YES!!

KA-CHING KA-CHING SORRY WE ALSO HAVE AN INVISIBLE SPRAY THAT PROTECTS AGAINST SCURVY AND TAX WELL...

OKAY.

AUDITS.

INITIAL HERE IF YOU WANT YOUR AIRBAG TO BE FULL OF FRESH ASPEN AIR INSTEAD OF GRAVEL.

ONLY $600.

AND THE LEASE TERMS ARE ENGRAVED ON THIS FREE HOOD ORNAMENT!

BE GLAD THEY DIDN'T INSTALL IT.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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