Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 5th March 2000

Dilbert//3977, first published 26 years ago on Sunday 5th March 2000

Tags

new personlaity non standard approved corporate personalities sycophants glad hander sadist prima donna empty suit whining misfit spec sheet dialoque

Official transcript

Caption reads: "Catbert, evil H.R. Director."

Catbert is sitting behind a desk in a throne-like chair. He tells Dilbert, who is sitting in a very small chair: "We've decided to give you a new personality."

Dilbert is surprised: "What! Why?"

Catbert explains: "You're current personality is non-standard."

He continues: "You must choose one of the approved corporate personalities."

Catbert presents the options: "The choices are sycophant, glad-hander, sadist, quantoid, prima donna, empty suit, or whining misfit."

Dilbert says: "Empty suit sounds interesting."

Catbert says: "Excellent choice. Here's the Spec Sheet."

Wally asks Dilbert about the meeting: "How did it go?"

Dilbert answers, reading from the Spec Sheet: "Same ol' Same ol'. You got that right!"

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

CATBERT: EVIL H.R. DIRECTOR WE'VE DECIDED TO GIVE YOU A NEW PERSONALITY.

WHAT?

WHY?

YOUR CURRENT PERSONALITY IS NONSTANDARD.

YOU MUST CHOOSE ONE OF THE APPROVED CORPORATE PERSONALITIES.

THE CHOICES ARE SYCOPHANT, GLAD- HANDER, SADIST, QUANTOID, PRIMA DONNA, EMPTY SUIT OR WHINING MISFIT.

EMPTY SUIT SOUNDS INTERESTING.

EXCELLENT CHOICE. HERE'S THE SPEC SHEET.

HOW DID IT GO?

SAME OL' SAME OL'.

YOU GOT THAT RIGHT

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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