Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 12th January 2003

Dilbert//5020, first published 23 years ago on Sunday 12th January 2003

Tags

evil great idea ignorant and worthless manage budgets poorly conceived project managers pummel with fists

Official transcript

Asok enters The Boss' office and says, "I thought of a great idea."

Asok continues, "You could let the project managers manage their own budgets... What?"

Asok starts to look scared. He says, "You're giving me a look. I must try to guess what it means."

Asok continues, "We don't do things that way? If it were a good idea you'd already be doing it?"

Asok clutches his tie in fear and continues, "My ideas are poorly conceived?! I can't see the big picture?"

Asok jumps back and exclaims, "Gaaa!!! I am ignorant and worthless!!"

Asok punches himself in the face and exclaims, "I must pummel myself with my own tiny fists!!"

He cries, "Ow! Ow!"

Afterwards, The Boss says to Catbert, "They're kinda self-managed now."

Catbert responds, "Very evil: I purr in your general direction."

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

I THOUGHT OF A GREAT IDEA.

YOU COULD LET THE PROJECT MANAGERS MANAGE THEIR OWN BUDGETS...WHAT?

YOU'RE GIVING ME A LOOK. I MUST TRY TO GUESS WHAT IT MEANS.

WE DON'T DO THINGS THAT WAY? IF IT WERE A GOOD IDEA YOU'D ALREADY BE DOING IT?

MY IDEAS ARE POORLY CONCEIVED?! I CAN'T SEE THE BIG PICTURE?!

GAAA!!! I AM IGNORANT AND WORTHLESS!!

I MUST PUMMEL MYSELF WITH MY OWN TINY FISTS!!

ow!

Ow!

THEY'RE KINDA SELF- MANAGED NOW.

VERY EVIL: I PURR IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

AI Analysis

Title: "Project Management Mayhem"

Summary:

This Dilbert comic strip, originally published in 2003, revolves around a project manager's struggles with his team's lack of direction and his own self-doubt. The comic strip is divided into nine panels, each featuring a different character and their reactions to the project manager's attempts to manage the project.

Key Points:

• The project manager is frustrated with his team's lack of direction and their poor ideas.
• He is unsure of what to do and feels like he is wasting his time.
• The team's ideas are poorly conceived, and they are unable to see the big picture.
• The project manager is ignorant and worthless, according to the team.
• He must pummel himself with his own tiny fists, as he is unable to manage the project effectively.
• The team is evil and purrs in their general direction, indicating their lack of concern for the project's success.
• The project manager is left feeling defeated and uncertain about how to move forward.

Overall:

The comic strip highlights the challenges of project management and the importance of effective communication and leadership. It also pokes fun at the common frustrations that project managers face in their daily work.

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