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Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 2nd March 2003

Dilbert//5069, first published 23 years ago on Sunday 2nd March 2003


Tags

abuse audio menu system freezing love problem low level technician same questions too much optimism waited in que tech support


Official transcript

Dogbert is sitting at a computer. He says into a telephone headset, "This is Dogbert's Tech Support. How may I abuse you?"

The customer on the other end of the line responds, "Finally!! It took me an hour to penetrate your inscrutable audio menu system!"

The customer continues, "Then I waited in queue for forty minutes!"

The customer says, "My problem is that my computer keeps freezing..."

Dogbert's voice interrupts him, "Not so fast."

Dogbert says, "I need to know your name, address, phone number, operating system, e-mail address, serial numbers, software versions and video drivers."

The customer clenches his teeth and shakes his fist as Dogbert's voice continues, "Then I'll put you in queue for the low-level technician who can only tell you to reboot."

Dogbert continues, "He'll ask you the same questions for reasons that will baffle you."

The customer asks, "But eventually you'll solve my problem, right?"

Dogbert's voice replies, "Sure, if your problem is too much optimism."

originally published on dilbert.com


Open source transcript

THIS IS DOGBERT'S TECH SUPPORT. HOW MAY I ABUSE YOU?

FINALLY!! IT TOOK ME AN HOUR TO PENETRATE YOUR INSCRUTABLE AUDIO MENU SYSTEM!

THEN I WAITED IN QUEUE FOR FORTY MINUTES!

MY PROBLEM IS THAT MY COMPUTER KEEPS FREEZING...

I NEED TO KNOW YOUR NAME, ADDRESS, PHONE NUMBER, OPERATING SYSTEM, EMAIL ADDRESS, SERIAL NUMBERS, SOFTWARE VERSIONS AND VIDEO DRIVERS.

THEN I'LL PUT YOU IN QUEUE FOR THE LOW- LEVEL TECHNICIAN WHO CAN ONLY TELL YOU TO REBOOT.

HE'LL ASK YOU THE SAME QUESTIONS FOR REASONS THAT WILL BAFFLE YOU.

NO!

FAST.

BUT EVENTUALLY YOU'LL SOLVE MY PROBLEM, RIGHT?

SURE, IF YOUR PROBLEM IS TOO MUCH OPTIMISM.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive


AI Analysis

Comic Strip Title: "Tech Support"

Summary:

The comic strip "Tech Support" by Scott Adams, originally published in 2005, humorously portrays a common scenario where a frustrated customer seeks help from a technical support representative. The strip is divided into eight panels, each depicting a conversation between the customer and the representative.

Panel 1: The customer, Dogbert, is shown on the phone with a technical support representative. Dogbert is annoyed, while the representative appears calm.

Panel 2: Dogbert asks how he can abuse the representative, but the representative remains composed.

Panel 3: Dogbert explains that it took him an hour to penetrate his inscrutable audio menu system. The representative responds that his problem is that his computer keeps freezing.

Panel 4: Dogbert says he waited in queue for forty minutes. The representative asks if he'll ask the same questions for reasons that will baffle him.

Panel 5: Dogbert provides his name, address, phone number, operating system, email address, serial numbers, software versions, and video drivers. The representative asks if his problem is too much optimism.

Panel 6: Dogbert is shown with a speech bubble saying, "Not so fast." The representative responds, "But eventually you'll solve my problem, right?"

Panel 7: Dogbert is shown with a speech bubble saying, "Then I'll put you in queue for the low-level technician who can only tell you to reboot." The representative responds, "He'll ask you the same questions for reasons that will baffle you."

Panel 8: Dogbert is shown with a speech bubble saying, "Sure. If your problem is too much optimism." The representative responds, "But eventually you'll solve my problem, right?"

Overall: The comic strip pokes fun at the frustration and inefficiency often experienced when dealing with technical support. It highlights the common issue of being placed on hold or transferred to multiple representatives, only to be asked the same questions repeatedly. The strip also touches on the idea that sometimes, the problem may not be with the technology, but with the user's own expectations or optimism.

generated by llama-3.2-11b-vision-instruct


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