Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 1st January 2012

Dilbert//8296, first published fourteen years ago on Sunday 1st January 2012

Tags

big business business ethics executive program relocate vindictive stress loser turn down opportunity train discomfort underlings

Official transcript

Boss: You've been selected for our executive development program. That means we can make you relocate to any godforsaken dirt stain we want. As soon as you make friends or find romance, we'll move you to someplace new and worse. It won't be the sort of work you'll enjoy, and the stress might kill you. If you turn down this opportunity, the company will forever label you as a loser. If you accept the offer, the company will train you to find pleasure in the discomfort of your underlings. I'm doing it right now! Dilbert: I HATE MY LIFE!!! Boss: Yes, yes, say more.

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

YOUVE BEEN SELECTED FOR OUR EXECUTIVE DEVELOPMENT PROGRAM THAT MEANS WE CAN MAKE YOU RELOCATE DO A ST GOD FOR SAKET.

AS SOON AS YOU MAKE FRIENDS OR FIND ROMU TO SOMEPLACE NEW AND WORSE.

IT WON'T BE THE SORT OF WORK YOULL ENJOY, AND THE STRESS MIGHT KILL YOU.

IF YOU TURN DOWN THIS OPPORTUNITY, THE COMPANY WILL FOREVER LABEL YOU AS A LOSER.

IF YOU ACCEPT THE OFFER, THE COMPANY WILL TRAIN YOU TO FIND PLEASURE IN THE DISCOMFORT OF YOUR UNDERLINGS.

I'M DOING IT RIGHT NOW!

I HATE MY LIFE!!!

YES, YES.

SAY MORE.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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