Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 28th February 2016

Dilbert//9815, first published ten years ago on Sunday 28th February 2016

Tags

dating, fitbit, hackers, hacking, information, privacy, spying, surveillance, technology, relationships

Official transcript

Hackers Convention. Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert. Woman: I know. I just hacked your phone, your credit card, and your fitness band. No need for conversation. I know everything about you, including your current physiological state. Dilbert: I feel violated. Woman: No, you don't. Your vital signs are elevated. That means you're falling in love with me. Dilbert: Ha! I just hacked your fitness band and I see you have... no interest in me whatsoever. It was too late to reject her first.

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

HACKERS CONVENTION HI. I'M DILBERT.

I KNOW.

I JUST HACKED YOUR PHONE, YOUR CREDIT CARD, AND YOUR FITNESS BAND.

NO NEED FOR CONVERSATION.

I KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU, INCLUDING YOUR CURRENT PHYSIOLOGICAL STATE.

I FEEL VIOLATED.

NO, YOU DON'T.

YOUR VITAL SIGNS ARE ELEVATED. THAT MEANS YOU'RE FALLING IN LOVE WITH ME.

HA! I JUST HACKED YOUR FITNESS BAND AND I SEE YOU HAVE ME WHATSOEVER IT WAS TOO LATE TO REJECT HER FIRST.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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