Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 15th January 2017

Dilbert//10137, first published nine years ago on Sunday 15th January 2017

Tags

job, scope, negotiating, engineer, demands, failure, stress, business, engineering

Official transcript

Boss: We need to cut our budget. Go to all of our vendors and tell them to reduce their prices. Dilbert: Why would they do that for us? Boss: Tell them we'll buy from someone else unless they do. Dilbert: That's what we told them to get the prices we have now. I'm an engineer, not a professional negotiator. Your plan has failure designed into it. Your poor leadership already has me on the edge of madness. This could push me over the edge. Boss: And I need it done by Tuesday.

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

WE NEED TO CUT OUR BUDGET.

GO TO ALL OF OUR VENDORS AND TELL THEM TO REDUCE THEIR PRICES.

WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT FOR US?

TELL THEM WELL BUY FROM SOMEONE ELSE UNLESS THEY THAT'S WHAT WE TOLD THEM TO GET THE PRICES WE HAVE NOW.

IM AN ENGINEER, NOT A PROFESSIONAL NEGOTIATOR. YOUR PLAN HAS FAILURE DESIGNED INTO IT.

YOUR POOR LEADERSHIP ALREADY HAS ME ON THE EDGE OF MADNESS. THIS COULD PUSH ME OVER THE EDGE.

AND I NEED IT DONE BY TUESDAY.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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