Dilbert cartoon first published on Sunday 3rd September 2017

Dilbert//10368, first published nine years ago on Sunday 3rd September 2017

Tags

customer service, loyalty program, survey, frustration

Official transcript

Man: Would you like to sign up for our customer loyalty program? Dilbert: Why would I do that? Man: If you don't we'll overcharge you on your purchases. But if you sign up, we will add a new level of complexity to your life that will make you hate us. Dilbert: I'll stick with the customer disloyalty program. Just overcharge me and I'll never come back. Man: You can get ten percent off your purchase today if you fill out an online customer survey and enter our store code. Dilbert: Please just overcharge me and let me leave! Man: I almost hesitate to ask which extended warranty option you want.

originally published on dilbert.com

Open source transcript

WOULD YOU LIKE TO SIGN UP FOR OUR CUSTOMER LOYALTY PROGRAM?

WHY WOULD I DO THAT?

IF YOU DON'T, WELL OVERCHARGE YOU ON YOUR PURCHASES.

BUT IF YOU SIGN UP, WE WILL ADD A NEW LEVEL OF COMPLEXITY TO YOUR LIFE THAT WILL MAKE YOU HATE I'LL STICK WITH THE CUSTOMER DISLOYALTY PROGRAM. JUST OVERCHARGE ME AND I'LL NEVER COME BACK.

YOU CAN GET 10% OFF YOUR PURCHASE TODAY IF YOU FILL OUT AN ONLINE CUSTOMER SURVEY AND ENTER OUR STORE CODE.

PLEASE JUST OVERCHARGE ME AND LET ME LEAVE!

I ALMOST HESITATE TO ASK WHICH EXTENDED WARRANTY OPTION YOU WANT.

collated from github.com/jvarn/dilbert-archive

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